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Job Titles Are Getting A Little Goofy

06/04/2013

10-stupid-digital-job-titles1

Companies trying to appear to be hip, compassionate or cutting edge are coming up with job titles that aren’t cutting it.

For example Build-A-Bear Workshop announced yesterday it has a new Chief Executive Bear. Whaa?

Seems the word Chief can be added to nearly words to give the individual holding down the job a sense of power. Here’s a short list of dumb job titles:

Chief Listener – Who are they listening to and what are they listening for?

Chief Happiness Officer – Does this position hand out money? That’s what makes me happy!

Chief People Officer – Uh, are you the HR guy?

Waste Removal Expert – Isn’t that the garbage man?

Social Media Missionary – Do you go door to door spreading the word?

Anything ‘Evangelist’ – Must work closely with the Social Media Missionary

Anything ‘Guru’ – C’mon, if the person in  the job isn’t the best of the best, dump ’em

Czar – that’s a nickname…not a title

All this pc, gender neutral, hipness is hot air.

Titles are placeholders. What’s truly important is how you do your job. If you deliver results, satisfy customers, grow internal talent – you are doing your job.

Titles are also relative. Being a CEO of a start-up making $12,000 a year is not the same as being a Director at Target while knocking down a $250,000 salary.

In the end, however, money and responsibility drive power not ‘chiefness’.

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